Every mentoring relationship concludes at some point. It should end well if possible, and part of drawing it to a productive close is looking back and reflecting on what’s happened since the start.
Starts at the beginning
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Recognises achievement
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Acknowledges difficulties
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Involves reflecting on the relationship
On first setting out to mentor a student, you may be full of aspiration for what will be achieved. It could seem premature to be thinking about how the mentoring should end, but the start is a good time to do it – every effective plan has an end game in mind. Concluding the relationship professionally offers a great opportunity for reflection and learning on all sides.
Industry placements have a defined timeline – you know from the start when the placement ends, so it’s easier to plan the final phase of mentoring.
Your last mentoring session is a milestone. It’s a perfect time for you to look back over the distance travelled, analyse what you’ve both learned and look ahead. You want the student to feel a sense of pride about their placement so they can focus confidently on the next steps.
One of the main things I’ve learnt from being a mentor is setting clear parameters to make sure that everybody’s expectations are being managed. I think that’s important from the beginning, and helps you approach the ending, so you’re both on the same page… For me, talking about the end of a mentoring relationship starts in your very first meeting
Mentor in a UK charitable organisation
There are two kinds of recognition at the end of a mentoring relationship. First, recognition of the student’s achievements on their placement.
Second, just as valuable but more often forgotten, is to recognise what the mentor and student have achieved during their time together. Successful mentoring relationships include the growth of mutual respect, a sense of personal connection between student and mentor, and recognition of shared values. It’s important to recognise these too, not just on a purely human level but also because they help to set up a valuable template for relationships the student will develop in future.
Recognition can help students to feel fully aware and proud of what they have achieved.
“When I started I wanted to become more self-confident and have a better control of my emotions, I didn’t expect to win an award. Honestly, I am very satisfied about my achievement and recognition”
Student who gained a ‘Mentee of the Year’ award
Mentoring is a two-way reciprocal relationship, so mentors may also feel justified pride for their part in its success.
“It feels really rewarding to have taken part. I felt so uplifted that my student thanked me for what they achieved on their journey during the placement”
Mentor reflecting on her first mentoring role
“I think the mentor gets a lot out of just the satisfaction of seeing their student succeed and that is important in itself, that’s the most important part…”
Experienced mentor
How could the achievements of a student be recognised, informally and formally?
Sometimes a mentoring relationship doesn’t work out as well as hoped. When it comes to the end, it can be helpful for everyone to try and identify the reasons.
They may be circumstantial:
Or the reason may go deeper:
Acknowledging difficulties and trying to understand why they occur is an important part of self-awareness and emotional maturity. Helping to make such a discussion possible is one way for a mentor to continue supporting the student even if things haven’t gone to plan.
The final phase of mentoring is a good opportunity for reflection. Which questions do you think you’d like to reflect on with a student, at the end of the placement?
Here are a few suggestions:
The focus of reflection is likely to be on the student and their learning. But as always in mentoring, the relationship is a two-way street, so you should reflect on it from your own angle as well.
To me, mentoring is about building a synergistic relationship based on common interests and goals. I like to think of our relationship as a journey to a better place, somewhere neither of us would have gone to alone
A mentor’s reflection on mentoring
You might want to take a structured approach and debrief the experience together. Here’s how it works:
In a mentoring relationship, two people become familiar with one another and develop a professional bond. Breaking the bond may hold fears. It will almost certainly cause questions.
What will your relationship be afterwards?
One perfectly good answer is that there won’t be any more contact once the placement is finished. This might be the likely outcome for most industry placement students. Hopefully the experience was good but you’ve both done your job now and it’s a natural point to end.
However, there may be times where the mentoring continue, e.g. if your organisation is thinking of offering the student an apprenticeship or a job afterwards. In a situation like this you may want to continue supporting the student until they finish their course and start a job. If so, be clear and realistic about the details, such as when and how often the mentoring contact will be.
How will the student continue to learn?
You want the student to feel excited and optimistic about the future. The endgame can be used to set up a strong emotional commitment to learning more – about jobs, careers, themselves, other people, society … It’s all about motivation. You want to watch them leave the room on a high.
Practically speaking, you may also want to provide advice and guidance about how the student can carry on getting support from others to carry on growing and developing. Your mentoring relationship can be a template. Help them see that they can look around them for what they need.
"Find someone fabulous and make it your mission to make them your mentor. Try someone from a similar background and whose life you think you might want in five years"
Leader of a mentoring programme for students
Starts at the beginning
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Recognises achievement
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Acknowledges difficulties
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Involves reflecting on the relationship
Mentoring matters – An introduction to the mentoring process
T-level employer support package:
End-of-placement review with the learner
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End-of-placement review with the provider
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